For Humor

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Re: For Humor

Postby Desmond » Fri May 22, 2015 5:25 pm

enter barge
A large flat-topped public transport barge shoves off from the dock and floats into the foggy gloom of the lake.

You can't go that way.


I cry evertim

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Re: For Humor

Postby Vaylon » Tue May 26, 2015 2:18 am

There were a number of funny moments today at the festival, and I'd like to post a few of my favorite ones. (I'll edit for brevity's sake.)

Jilliana has accepted Seamstress Amelie's offer and is now holding a clear glass bottle.
Niki asks, "Can I snif you Jill?"
Niki grins.
Jilliana asks, "One moment. No weirdness ok?"
Jilliana carefully applies some perfume to her skin.
Seamstress Amelie sniffs at Jilliana.
Jilliana sniffs herself.
Jake sniffs at Jilliana.
Fayne sniffs at Jilliana.
Niki sniffs at Jilliana.
Jake says, "Jilliana smells like...outside."
Niki nods.
You sniff at Jilliana.
Jilliana has the earthy scent of honeysuckle fragrance wreathed subtly with the heavy scent of a fresh rain clinging to their body.
Taric sniffs at Jilliana.
Ardor sniffs at Jilliana.
Jilliana asks, "Does it smell bad?"
Jilliana rubs her chin thoughtfully.
Jake says, "No."
Niki exclaims, "No!"
Speaking to Jilliana, Fayne says, "Smells kinda like what I want. Not quite though."
Seamstress Amelie shakes her head.
Jake says, "Best one I've smelled today."
Niki says, "It suits you."
(Vaylon licks the back of Jilliana's left hand.)
Niki blinks at you.
You gag, making a choking sound.
Taric blinks at you.
Fayne stares at you.
You laugh!
You innocently explain, "I thought it would taste good, too."


Niki asks, "What is a secretary?"
Speaking to Niki, you slyly say, "A secretary is someone who ..."
Speaking to you, Jilliana says, "Don't say it."
Speaking to you, Niki asks, "Who?"
Speaking to you, Fayne says, "Don't be dirty."
Speaking to you, Jilliana says, "She'll slap you."
You cautiously say, "No, no, I shouldn't answer this."
Niki asks, "Oh is it a whore?"
Fayne laughs at Niki.
Niki grins.
Speaking to Niki, Jilliana says, "Uh. No."
You laugh!
Speaking to Niki, Fayne says, "I think it's like a steward."
Niki asks, "Then why would I slap him?"
Jilliana nods to Fayne.
Niki says, "See that's a word I know."
Niki grins at Fayne.
Speaking to Niki, Jilliana says, "Because some men take them to bed."
Fayne smiles at Niki.
Niki says, "Oh my."
Niki says, "Most stewards I know are, male."
You lean toward Jilliana and whisper, "If they even make it to the bed."
Speaking to Niki, Fayne says, "Stewardess."
Speaking to Niki, Jilliana says, "Yes, but I've known of a few females."
Jilliana laughs at you.


Ardor has accepted Seamstress Amelie's offer and is now holding a squat brown glass bottle.
Ardor carefully applies some perfume to his skin.
Ardor sniffs himself.
Seamstress Amelie sniffs at Ardor.
You sniff at Ardor.
Ardor has the heavy scent of clean leather wreathed subtly with notes of citrus clinging to him. A subtle tang of mahogany gives the scent an almost smoky flavor, with notes of cognac to balance out the melange.
Fayne sniffs at Ardor.
Jilliana sniffs at Ardor.
(Vaylon gives a thumbs up to Ardor.)
Jake sniffs at Ardor.
Niki sniffs at Ardor.
Jilliana nods to Ardor.
Ardor says, "I think this is what it feels to have dogs."


Speaking to you, Laroremas says, "Can't be as bad as old man Kent getting stuck in swampsand five times in a row."
Laroremas wistfully says, "I can still hear those cries of help to this day."


Speaking to Indra, Akila says, "I'd like a band of blue lotus flowers starting behind my ear and going down to my shoulder."
Speaking to Indra, Akila says, "Dagger or needle. Either works for me."
Fayne blinks at Akila.
Kunren blinks.
You blink at Akila.
Kunren asks, "Dagger?"
Konrad smirks.
Akila nods to Kunren.
You murmur, "Damn, that's hardcore."
Laroremas amusedly says, "The old style."
Indra says, "Needle will look better, if I tried to carve out that kind of scar...well you wouldn't like it much."
Akila laughs!
Speaking to Indra, Kunren asks, "So you do dagger work and needle work apparently... I guess you work with brands too?"
Indra says, "Mhm."
Kunren blinks.
Konrad smirks.
Desmond rubs his chin thoughtfully.
(Vaylon moos at Kunren.)
Desmond slowly asks, "Have you ever branded someone's ass?"
Fayne giggles at you!
Kunren says, "Its a tough man, or woman who gets in that chair to be branded."
Konrad sighs.
Indra eyes Desmond speculatively.
Speaking to Desmond, Indra says, "Are you offering yourself up for the experience?"
Konrad shakes his head at Desmond.
Desmond chuckles at Konrad.
Speaking to Desmond, you offer, "I will pay for that."
Kunren chuckles.
Desmond rolls his eyes.
"I hope you have not been leading a double life, pretending to be wicked and being really good all the time. That would be hypocrisy." - The Importance of Being Earnest, Oscar Wilde

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Re: For Humor

Postby Acarin » Tue Jun 02, 2015 1:42 pm

sniff zuki
You sniff yourself.
an infested cat exudes the unmistakable smell of BO.

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Re: For Humor

Postby Jirato » Wed Jun 03, 2015 5:42 am

Last night I was troubleshooting some bugs with minor animates, and stored the critter I had animated in my toolkit to investigate later.

This morning, I saw that somebody submitted a bug report about a carved stave, so the first step in reproducing it and identifying the bug is to make one of my own...

forage branch
[Roll Result: 78281]
You forage around for a bit and manage to find a medium straight fir branch!
[S]EAvd>
carve
You retrieve a man from your folded black leather toolkit.
You carve away at your medium straight fir branch with your man, removing the rough layer of bark in shavings that fall to the ground.
[S]EAvd>
[GMCHAT Uyoku]: Octum is when the octumbunny comes around and lays pumpkins everywhere right?
[GMCHAT Rias]: Dimmes says "oh hai :) u need healz? ill get u dont worry thaum lasers pew pew pew lol"
[CHAT - GameMaster Rias would totally nuke Rooks]: Here's how elemancy works: The freeblegreeble and the zippoflasm have to be combined with the correct ration of himbleplimp, then you add the gargenheimer and adjust the froopulon for the pattern you want, apply some tarratarrtarr, yibble the wantaban, and let 'er rip!

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Re: For Humor

Postby Acarin » Wed Jun 03, 2015 7:19 am

Interesting new feature. I'll have to get a man for carving.

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Re: For Humor

Postby Acarin » Wed Jun 03, 2015 7:31 am

[CHAT - Linux Sorcerer GM Jirato]: You don't have to come and chat. We're looking for you, we're gonna title you, we're gonna title you.

[CHAT - Brawler Zuki is climbing in your windows and snatching your people up]: Hide your name, Jirato

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Re: For Humor

Postby blindndangerous » Wed Jun 03, 2015 8:27 pm

[ESP-GRAY - Gunmetal-Gray]: I have trousers.
[ESP-GRAY - Onyx]: What KIND of trousers?
[ESP-GRAY - Dark-Turquoise]: Yes. Good. yYou put on pants. Now, where are the rest of the corpses?
[ESP-GRAY - Gunmetal-Gray]: A pair of straight legged black tweed trousers.
[ESP-GRAY - Onyx]: Damn, those are some fancy pants.
[ESP-GRAY - Gunmetal-Gray]: A pair of crazy legs like mine need some fancy pants.
[ESP-GRAY - Sky-Blue]: Kent. Will ya come fight or keep talking about stupid things tonight? Honestly!
[ESP-GRAY - Gunmetal-Gray]: I told you, in town.
[ESP-GRAY - Dark-Brown]: Go pantsless for this for god's sake. your penis can wait to be covered until emleth is free can't it?
A towering white-furred snow yeti exclaims, "Oog!"

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Re: For Humor

Postby sona » Sun Jun 07, 2015 11:59 am

[ESP-GRAY - Dark-Turquoise]: It's a man thing, Liani.
A loud vendor nearby tries to sell you some nuts.

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Re: For Humor

Postby Acarin » Sun Jun 07, 2015 12:43 pm

[Sparse Grassland] (OutWldPlGrDt) [semiarid] Chilly, Heavy Rain, Light Breeze
The area consists of semiarid grassy dirt flat plains.
The area is mostly quiet.
Also here: a shaggy bison (drenched).
Obvious paths: west, northwest, north, northeast, east, southeast, south, southwest.


Travel time: 4 seconds.

(energy -4)
EAvdDr>
tackle bison
Your confidence is admirable, but a shaggy bison is far bigger and/or heavier than you are.

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Re: For Humor

Postby Uandir » Sun Jun 07, 2015 1:29 pm

You say, "And he will take your shadow away..like he did your voice."
drink voice
Drink what?

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Re: For Humor

Postby Vaylon » Thu Jun 11, 2015 8:07 am

Leondre's a funnyman!
Ohielle says, "Still dunno why he gave me that dirk."
Speaking to Ohielle, you say, "He's sweet on you."
You say, "Men give things to people they want to bed. It's fact."
Speaking to you, Ohielle says, "I doubt that is why he gave me that weapon."
Speaking to Leondre, you casually say, "Don't read into that hat, though."
You scoff at Ohielle.
Leondre plainly says, "Vaylon probably encouraged him to give you 'the D' and he misunderstood."
You laugh!
Ohielle laughs!

Did I tell you his player is terrified of spiders in real life?
You and Leondre heave the corpse of a hairy brown spider from a clay-red large-wheeled pine wagon to the ground.
Roundtime: 5 seconds.
Speaking to Leondre, you ask, "Hairy, isn't it?"
You grin at Leondre.
[FROM Leondre (OOC)]: I will cut you
"I hope you have not been leading a double life, pretending to be wicked and being really good all the time. That would be hypocrisy." - The Importance of Being Earnest, Oscar Wilde

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Re: For Humor

Postby Sneaky » Fri Jun 12, 2015 9:17 am

[CHAT - Claudin is a real swell guy]: So, there's a Canadian cartel that manipulates the supply of maple syrup to keep prices high. Like OPEC, but with syrup.
[CHAT - Mister Geppetto Vidor]: See, that's your problem! Your major crime involves pancakes.
[CHAT - Master Drunkard Coanid]: Are you serious
[CHAT - Fayne]: Claudin, my ex told me about that. lol
You overhear the following rumor:
"There's nothing better in life than maple-drenched wheatcakes!"
[FROM Liani (OOC)]: It's an ice cream conehead
You also notice a bronze crossbow bolt (x8) and the corpse of a slender pale white cave drakolin.

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Re: For Humor: The most effective super villin

Postby Sneaky » Sat Jun 13, 2015 11:27 am

[ESP-GRAY - Ivory]: I need a healer.
[ESP-GRAY - Rose-Gold]: Where?
[CHAT - Hipster Coanid]: I need a hero!
[CHAT - Paladin Maric Canavan - The Pizzavore]: but he's got to be brave, and he's got to be strong
[CHAT - Meliorator Althea Canavan is the Mud Momma]: I now have Short Circuit 2 in my head, thank you!
[CHAT - Claudin is the punctuation police]: The only way to defeat such a hero is a powerful enema
[CHAT - Claudin is the punctuation police]: *enemy. probably
[FROM Liani (OOC)]: It's an ice cream conehead
You also notice a bronze crossbow bolt (x8) and the corpse of a slender pale white cave drakolin.

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Re: For Humor

Postby Laroremas » Tue Jun 16, 2015 1:50 pm

As Jaster works, his nice copper lockpick gets stuck in the lock! He manages to work it free, but ends up bending it a little.

Speaking to a weatherbeaten dogwood box, Jaster says, "[frak] you."

Jaster says, "Moving on.. what else we got here."

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Re: For Humor

Postby Vertebrate » Wed Jun 24, 2015 3:20 pm

Dactor, has developed a professional medical theory (first aid level over 9000!) regarding the recent outbreak of eyesight disease in the lands. The most probable medical reason that everyone is suddenly wearing spectacles all at the same time, where none wore them merely weeks ago? Spores. Its gotta be the spores.
Dactor

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Re: For Humor Talk about lying down on the job

Postby Sneaky » Thu Jul 02, 2015 7:54 am

[Shadgard Jailhouse, Entry] (InUrRkCl)
Built of thick, sturdy wood, this small room serves as the entry to the Shadgard Jail. The structure has been built up against the red rock of the canyon, which makes up the western wall. Several heavy copper-bound wooden #doors have been set into the wall, small barred windows in their faces. A simple pine desk and #chair sit at the northern end of the structure.
The dim light lessens your vision slightly. The area is mostly quiet.
Also here: a Shadgard deputy (lying down).
Obvious exits: out.
[FROM Liani (OOC)]: It's an ice cream conehead
You also notice a bronze crossbow bolt (x8) and the corpse of a slender pale white cave drakolin.

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Re: For Humor

Postby Jaster » Thu Jul 02, 2015 9:45 am

Typical. Sleeping on the job.

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Re: For Humor

Postby Bryce » Thu Aug 06, 2015 11:09 am

You continue picking the lock on a rectangular cedar chest with your master's steel lockpick.
(You determine this to be a warded lock, its difficulty rated at about ****.)
You hear a satisfying *click* come from a rectangular cedar chest.
Roundtime: 5 seconds.

You cheer!

You mutter, "That thing's been in this hall for years!"

You open a rectangular cedar chest.

In the rectangular cedar chest you see a small pile of riln.
There is plenty of room left in the rectangular cedar chest.

You gather 98 riln from a rectangular cedar chest.

You smirk.

You say, "Well, it was the overcome challenge that was the real reward."
Speaking to you, Vaylon asks, "If I touch your hair, will I get some of your power?"
[CHAT - Helenna]: I don't know if it's funny or disturbing that you know which are the best water closets in the game.

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Re: For Humor

Postby blindndangerous » Thu Aug 20, 2015 12:39 pm

[ESP-GRAY - Sandstone-Orange]: And no way is my salami going near a vampire.
A towering white-furred snow yeti exclaims, "Oog!"

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Re: For Humor

Postby Xanthe » Sat Sep 12, 2015 6:24 pm

(Training gone wrong.)

You attack Seneca with your iron-barbed leather whip!
whip (++++++) (M:51 vs D:25) 2 rake damage -- to the left arm, greatly deflected by some lamellar vambraces.

Speaking to you, Seneca exclaims, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me!"

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Re: For Humor

Postby Kent » Sun Oct 11, 2015 11:53 am

Has no body the log of last night's customization event with Tollk they can post here? Last night we witnessed some of the funniest shiz in the history of
CLOK and it would be a shame if Bryce and others were unable to read it.
- Kent "Gunney" Gunderman


A dirty woodsman frowns at you and suggests you return after getting cleaned up.

Helpful tips, commands, and hints for new CLOKers: viewtopic.php?f=6&t=2367&p=12822#p12822

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Re: For Humor

Postby lin » Sun Oct 11, 2015 12:06 pm

Code: Select all
(Type stop to stop auto-logging.)
You continue chopping at a yew tree with your logging axe.
A small yew tree falls to the ground with a loud crash!
 ** Suddenly you realize the tree is falling directly toward A patch of stygian voidgrass. TIMBER!

   9 crush damage --!
A patch of stygian voidgrass tries to scramble out of the way but moves too slow! The tree strikes him, knocking him to the ground!

Roundtime: 18 seconds.

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Re: For Humor

Postby Sneaky » Wed Oct 14, 2015 11:52 am

An infested cat springs from hiding to attack!
An infested cat is scorched by fire as it draws near to Lyn!
41 fire damage (head)
Head, hair, flesh and face completely fried to a crisp.
An infested cat has been defeated.
An infested cat attacks Lyn with its teeth!
teeth (-----) Dodged!
[FROM Liani (OOC)]: It's an ice cream conehead
You also notice a bronze crossbow bolt (x8) and the corpse of a slender pale white cave drakolin.

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Re: For Humor

Postby Rias » Wed Oct 14, 2015 12:11 pm

Momentum: It's a thing.
The lore compels me!

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Re: For Humor

Postby Vaylon » Fri Oct 16, 2015 9:27 am

Kent wrote:Has no body the log of last night's customization event with Tollk they can post here? Last night we witnessed some of the funniest shiz in the history of CLOK and it would be a shame if Bryce and others were unable to read it.

I have a log of part of it. I've edited it for brevity, but it's still quite long. Sorry! I included Kent's OOC messages to me (with his permission!) because they made me laugh:
You head into a patchwork unevenly constructed wagon.

Kent removes a bronze forging-hammer from his silver-buckled black leather tool belt.

Kent takes off a silver-buckled black leather tool belt.

You nod in greeting.

Helenna has a few words with Tollk.

Speaking to Kent, Levintus innocently asks, "There's nothing you need Tollk to work on?"

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, Kent asks, "Can you notch up my belt?"

Akila smirks at Levintus.

Levintus smiles.

Kent offers a silver-buckled black leather tool belt to the flesh golem Tollk.

Speaking to Kent, the flesh golem Tollk says, "I make MANY notches."

The flesh golem Tollk has accepted Kent's offer and is now holding a silver-buckled black leather tool belt.

Hakon arrives.

Hakon blinks.

Kent says, "But of course."

Helenna blinks.

The flesh golem Tollk looks around for its tools.

Hakon says, "Eesh, careful this thing don't collapse with that in here."

The flesh golem Tollk carefully examines a silver-buckled black leather tool belt.

Speaking to Levintus, you curiously murmur, "What kind of work's ... he do?"

[FROM Kent (OOC)]: instead of good alterations, he's really frakking things up....hilarious

Speaking to you, Levintus innocently says, "Sort of an all-round expert. You might consider having him make some improvements to your most expensive firearm."

You rub your chin thoughtfully, pondering the situation.

Kent covers his face with his bronze forging-hammer, peeking at Levintus through his fingers.

Helenna glances at Kent and winces.

Speaking to Levintus, you exclaim, "Good idea!"

Hakon eyes the flesh golem Tollk speculatively.

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, you ask, "Do you work on firearms?"

Speaking to you, Helenna asks, "Uh. Let go of my horse?"

You arch an eyebrow at Helenna.

You disband your group.

Kent says, "Give him some lichen to eat, he doesn't mind that."

You cover your face with your palm.

Speaking to you, Levintus slyly says, "He did a good job of keeping my map safe from wear and tear, by unexpected though admittedly ingenious means."

Helenna starts leading a golden-maned palomino quarter horse.

With obvious effort, Helenna climbs up onto the back of a golden-maned palomino quarter horse.

Helenna heads out, riding a golden-maned palomino quarter horse.

Speaking to Levintus, you curiously ask, "Eh? Can you show me?"

The flesh golem Tollk offers a many buckled scratched leather belt to Kent.

The flesh golem Tollk exclaims, "I make better, AGAIN!"

Kent has accepted the flesh golem Tollk's offer and is now holding a many buckled scratched leather belt.

Kent carefully examines a many buckled scratched leather belt.

Kent shows a bronze forging-hammer to Akila.

Kent swaps his forging-hammer to his left hand and his belt to his right hand.

Kent shows a many buckled scratched leather belt to Akila.

Speaking to you, Levintus says, "Oh I wouldn't trouble you with the details."

Kent shows a many buckled scratched leather belt to Levintus.

Helenna arrives.

Kent shows you his many buckled scratched leather belt.
This belt has the addition of many additional unnecessary buckles in the wrong places. Along the side are also pictures of hands and smiley faces scratched onto the surface.

Kent shows a many buckled scratched leather belt to Helenna.

You nod to Kent.

Kent shows a many buckled scratched leather belt to Hakon.

Speaking to Kent, Levintus says, "A fine addition to you wardrobe."

Hakon rubs his chin thoughtfully.

Kent wraps a many buckled scratched leather belt around his waist.

Helenna giggles!

Speaking to Kent, Akila exclaims, "It matches my sheath!"

Speaking to you, the flesh golem Tollk says, "Forearms! Yes Tollk works with forearms. I make loud bangs with dem."

Kent hands the flesh golem Tollk some riln.

The flesh golem Tollk grins.

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, you excitedly exclaim, "Excellent. I will return with mine for you to work on, then!"

Hakon frowns.

Kent says, "Tollk has...lots of forearms."

Speaking to Helenna, you say, "I'm going to get my musket."

Helenna has a few words with Tollk.

Helenna nods to you.

You laugh at Kent.

You give Helenna a quick smooch on the lips.

You head out.

Later:
You head into a patchwork unevenly constructed wagon.

(Helenna eyes the candles in the wagon dubiously.)

You wave.

The flesh golem Tollk offers some very horribly repaired and very misshapen leather boots to Hakon.

Hakon has accepted the flesh golem Tollk's offer and is now holding some very horribly repaired and very misshapen leather boots.

Hakon carefully examines some very horribly repaired and very misshapen leather boots.

The flesh golem Tollk exclaims, "Better!"

Hakon swears quietly.

Hakon puts some very horribly repaired and very misshapen leather boots on his feet.

(Helenna leans over to look at the boots.)

Hakon says, "Th' funny thing is, they do look better."

Akila glances at Hakon.

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, Hakon says, "My thanks."

The flesh golem Tollk grins.

Levintus takes a bite of his flesh golem shaped candies, finishing it off.

Kent says, "At least they're repaired."

You sigh.

You take off a long pink-painted steel musket with a sparkling varnished cedar stock.

Helenna takes a bite of her flesh golem shaped candies.

[FROM Kent (OOC)]: he's going to puck it up

Hakon hands the flesh golem Tollk some riln.

[TO Kent (OOC)]: I'm perfectly OK with this.

You rub your chin thoughtfully, pondering the situation.

You ask, "Is anyone next in line?"

(Helenna makes a face upon biting. Her eyes widen as she continues to chew.)

The flesh golem Tollk lets out an extremely loud *BUUUUURP*.

Akila shakes her head.

You grin wryly at Helenna.

[FROM Kent (OOC)]: he can't puck it up any worse than it is, hehehe

Helenna offers to give you some flesh golem shaped candies.

[TO Kent (OOC)]: Yes, I was going to say that.

Levintus shakes his head.

Kent grimaces, a pained expression crossing his face.

You accept the offer and are now holding some flesh golem shaped candies.

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, you say, "I'm curious to see what you know about firearms."

You offer to give a long pink-painted steel musket with a sparkling varnished cedar stock to the flesh golem Tollk.

Kent says, "Me too."

The flesh golem Tollk has accepted your offer and is now holding a long pink-painted steel musket with a sparkling varnished cedar stock.

The flesh golem Tollk suddenly drops a long pink-painted steel musket with a sparkling varnished cedar stock, as if burned by its touch!
4 alchemical damage (right hand)

You wince.

The flesh golem Tollk exclaims, "OUCH!"

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, Helenna asks, "Ya burp wonderuflly. Can ya teach me?"

The flesh golem Tollk exclaims, "Bad FOREARMS!"

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, you apologetically say, "Sorry."

The flesh golem Tollk kicks the firearms like a naughty dog.

You wince.

Helenna winces.

Helenna says, "Damn Vaylon."

You pick up a long pink-painted steel musket with a sparkling varnished cedar stock with your right hand.

You sling a long pink-painted steel musket with a sparkling varnished cedar stock over your shoulder.

You mutter.

The flesh golem Tollk *BUUUUURPS* proudly.

You take a bite of your flesh golem shaped candies.
SUPER SOUR on the outside but surprisingly sweet on the inside.

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, Akila concernedly asks, "Are you okay?"

Helenna opens a black leather satchel.

The flesh golem Tollk says, "Tollk ok. Forearms bad."

Levintus puts a sewn shut Northern Lost Lands map in the sinew-stitched sailcloth satchel that he is wearing.

Hakon has a few words with the flesh golem Tollk.

You glance at Levintus.

[FROM Kent (OOC)]: looks like it turns out you pucked it up!

Levintus glances at you.

Hakon glances at Levintus.

[TO Kent (OOC)]: Yes. Unsurprisingly.

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, you cautiously say, "How long will you be here? Perhaps I can bring you a -- a better one. One that doesn't hurt."

Hakon carefully examines some very horribly repaired and very misshapen leather boots.

[FROM Kent (OOC)]: i actually shoulda seen that coming, didnt, which made it twice as funny

[TO Kent (OOC)]: I aim to please!

The flesh golem Tollk pulls out a huge hammer in preparation for Vaylon's "forearms".

The flesh golem Tollk exclaims, "I smash good!"

You nod to the flesh golem Tollk.

Hakon adopts an agreeable expression.

Akila laughs at the flesh golem Tollk.

Helenna blinks.

Speaking to you, Hakon says, "Yer forearms are no good."

The flesh golem Tollk says, "I fix hands. ouch..."

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, Helenna says, "I'm tryin' to heal ya, but ya won't stop movin'."

The flesh golem Tollk goes out back for a moment and comes back with a bandage over one hand.

(Helenna sighs sadly.)

Helenna nods.

Kent leans toward Helenna and whispers something.

Helenna closes a black leather satchel.

Hakon closes a horn-clasped doeskin pack.

You look at Hakon and shrug.

(Helenna wrinkles her nose at Kent.)

Hakon frowns at Kent.

The flesh golem Tollk picks its nose but then another hands slaps that hand away and tries to pick.

Helenna stares.

(Helenna stares at the golem with morbid fascination.)

Hakon squints.

Miko arrives.

Miko nods in greeting.

Akila stretches, raising her arms high over her head.

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, Helenna asks, "Do ya only do repairs?"

Kent nods to Miko in greeting.

Miko asks, "Hmm any water around here?"

Large drops of water circle around Levintus's hands.

Levintus makes a wide, arcing gesture.
A thick mist gathers around Levintus, forming into a water sphere that continuously swirls around him.

You duck.

Levintus gestures at Miko, causing a spray of water to wash him off. A moment later, the water vanishes.
The blood has been washed from Miko.

Speaking to Helenna, the flesh golem Tollk says, "Tollk master of all trades. Make all item better."

Levintus laughs at you.

Miko says, "Thanks."

The sphere of water swirling around Levintus suddenly falls to the ground with a splash.

Miko grins.

Miko has a few words with Tollk.

Speaking to Helenna, Kent explains, "He brings a whole new meaning to the word, repair."

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, Hakon asks, "Can yeh MAKE somethin' new on request?"

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, Akila says, "Thank you for the decoration."

Akila waves.

Akila heads out.

Miko says, "Hmm I"m poor so.. just came to look."

Speaking to Hakon, the flesh golem Tollk says, "Tollk can do anything. No limits to Tollk."

Hakon whistles tunelessly to himself.

Kent hands Miko some riln.

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, Helenna asks, "How much ya charge?"

Helenna opens a square black leather locksmith kit.

Helenna opens a black leather satchel.

Helenna transfers the contents of her square black leather locksmith kit into a black leather satchel.

Helenna closes a black leather satchel.

Kent takes off a many buckled scratched leather belt.

Helenna removes a square black leather locksmith kit from her simple rope belt.

Kent shows a many buckled scratched leather belt to Miko.

The flesh golem Tollk says, "Hel No need riln. Art is art if itself. I do for Tollk. I do for art."

The flesh golem Tollk farts.

Hakon takes off some very horribly repaired and very misshapen leather boots.

Hakon shows some very horribly repaired and very misshapen leather boots to Miko.

Helenna sneezes.

Speaking to Miko, Hakon says, "He fixed my boots."

Hakon puts some very horribly repaired and very misshapen leather boots on his feet.

You cough.

Miko chuckles.

Hakon gags.

A FOUL odor fills the air.

You tilt your head slightly back, turning up your nose.

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, Helenna says, "That smell burns. What did ya eat before ya..uh..."

Hakon pulls the hood of his deeply hooded dappled bear fur cloak up over his head.

Hakon coughs.

Miko rubs his chin thoughtfully.

Helenna sneezes.

Kent coughs.

Miko takes off a black silver-trimmed longcoat.

Kent coughs.

Kent coughs.

Hakon gags.

Hakon heads out.

Miko offers a black silver-trimmed longcoat to the flesh golem Tollk.

The flesh golem Tollk exclaims, "Tollk also chef!"

You glance at the flesh golem Tollk.

Helenna mutters, "Somethin of one."

The flesh golem Tollk has accepted Miko's offer and is now holding a black silver-trimmed longcoat.

(Kent wafts the air away, standing near the door.)

Miko says, "Hmm."

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, you ask, "What is your specialty?"

Speaking to Helenna, Miko asks, "Maybe problem solved?"

Speaking to Miko, the flesh golem Tollk asks, "You want Toll make better?"

(Helenna wipes the tears rolling down her cheeks.)

Miko nods to the flesh golem Tollk.

Miko grins at Helenna.

The flesh golem Tollk pulls out some large twisted metal tools and a large uneven hammer.

(Helenna makes a face at Miko.)

Helenna sniffles.

Speaking to Helenna, Miko asks, "What happened?"

Helenna indignantly says, "He farted."

You nod in agreement.

Miko says, "I came prepared."

Helenna exclaims, "I gotta go breathe. be back!"

Kent says, "He farted the fart of the dead."

Miko pulls his hunter-green cotton neckerchief up over his lower face as a mask.

Helenna just left.

You take a bite of your flesh golem shaped candies.
UGH! Super salty! But as you continue to suck on it you find it has a pleasant sugary center.

Helenna just arrived.

You take a bite of your flesh golem shaped candies, finishing it off.
OOOOH, SOUR! SOUR! SOUR! Aaaaaah, but now a nice sugar sweet center.

Kent says, "Good idea."

The flesh golem Tollk offers a black longcoat with hammer marks and crude etchings to Miko.

Kent puts a bronze forging-hammer in the pebbled cordovan leather backpack that he is wearing.

The flesh golem Tollk exclaims, "Better!"

Miko has accepted the flesh golem Tollk's offer and is now holding a black longcoat with hammer marks and crude etchings.

Kent pulls his red paisley cotton neckerchief up over his lower face as a mask.

Miko carefully examines a black longcoat with hammer marks and crude etchings.

Speaking to Miko, Helenna says, "The silver's all gone."

Miko nods to Helenna.

Helenna sneezes.

You take a closer look at Miko's black longcoat with hammer marks and crude etchings.
The longcoat has been heavily beaten and worn in a few places. There are etches of hands, smiley faces and a big crude drawing of a flesh golem on the back.

The flesh golem Tollk exclaims, "Better!"

The flesh golem Tollk beams proudly.

Miko nods to the flesh golem Tollk.

Miko puts on a black longcoat with hammer marks and crude etchings.

Miko takes off a black longcoat with hammer marks and crude etchings.

Miko shows a sleek steel shortsword to Helenna.

Miko says, his voice muffled by a mask, "Oops."

Miko puts a sleek steel shortsword in the dark leather baldric that he is wearing.

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, Helenna asks, "Ya wanna decorate my locksmith bag and make it all pretty?"

Miko swaps his longcoat to his right hand.

Miko shows a black longcoat with hammer marks and crude etchings to Helenna.

Miko pulls his hunter-green cotton mask down off his face to rest around his neck as a neckerchief.

Miko beams happily!

Speaking to Miko, Helenna evenly says, "It's beautiful."

Miko nods.

Speaking to Helenna, Miko says, "It's.. interesting."

Miko nods.

You nod in agreement.

Helenna giggles!

Speaking to Helenna, the flesh golem Tollk says, "Toll thinks already ply craft for this one. Tollk very special for all not just one."

Miko puts on a black longcoat with hammer marks and crude etchings.

Kent rubs his chin thoughtfully.

Helenna shakes her head.

You look over Helenna thoughtfully.

Kent says, his voice muffled by a mask, "No that was another girl."

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, Helenna says, "I ain't had nothin' fixed by ya."

You nod to Helenna.

Miko pulls his hunter-green cotton neckerchief up over his lower face as a mask.

Speaking to Helenna, the flesh golem Tollk asks, "Tollk head work very good. Sometimes imagine doing work when not. I fix! What want Tollk make better?"

Helenna offers a square black leather locksmith kit to the flesh golem Tollk.

The flesh golem Tollk has accepted Helenna's offer and is now holding a square black leather locksmith kit.

The flesh golem Tollk rubs its chin thoughtfully.

Helenna asks, "Make it pretty, why don't ya?"

Helenna smiles.

A hands slaps the pondering hand away from its chin and instead tries to ponder Tollks chin. This makes the orginal pondering hand mad and it slaps the other hand away.

Miko blinks.

You chuckle quietly to yourself.

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, Helenna asks, "Could ya teach the mummer types to do that?"

The flesh golem Tollk gets its bag of tools.

The flesh golem Tollk says, "Ssssh, Tollk making art."

Helenna adds, "After ya teach me how to burp like ya, that is."

[ESP-GRAY - Cream]: There's someone at the festival who is fixing things for people. You are all missing out by not seeing him. Truly a one-of-a-kind experience.

[ESP-GRAY - Gunmetal-Gray]: You can say that again.

[ESP-GRAY - Pale-Gold]: If you mean the Golem, he's amazing.

[ESP-GRAY - Coral]: Bring ya hankies for ya nose.

You rub your chin thoughtfully, pondering the situation.

[ESP-GRAY - Olivine]: Hankies? Why--oh.

The flesh golem Tollk offers a round black overly stitched locksmith kit to Helenna.

The flesh golem Tollk exclaims, "Better!"

Helenna has accepted the flesh golem Tollk's offer and is now holding a round black overly stitched locksmith kit.

You take a closer look at Helenna's round black overly stitched locksmith kit.
It looks like someone has haphazardly cut the edges off the bag to make it round and most of the surface is covered in an abundant amount of roughly sewn threads. One section of thread looks like a smiley face.
It is open.

You rub your chin thoughtfully, pondering the situation.

Helenna beams happily!

Speaking to Helenna, you say, "D'awww."

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, Helenna happily exclaims, "Ya did beautiful!"

You nod in agreement.

The flesh golem Tollk beams with pride.

[ESP-GRAY - Olivine]: A golem? Really?

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, you say, "Okay -- I have something now that won't hurt you. It's an umbrella."

You remove a black oilcloth umbrella from the polished leather backpack you are wearing with your right hand.

Helenna attaches a round black overly stitched locksmith kit to her simple rope belt.

[ESP-GRAY - Pale-Gold]: They guy in the wagon. he's awesome.

Ydia arrives.

Ydia waves.

Ydia has a few words with Tollk.

Speaking to the flesh golem Tollk, you ask, "What do you think? Can you make it better?"

Miko chuckles quietly to himself.

Helenna giggles!

You show your black oilcloth umbrella to the flesh golem Tollk.

[ESP-GRAY - Gunmetal-Gray]: He's grotesque.

[ESP-GRAY - Coral]: Don't be rude.

Speaking to you, the flesh golem Tollk says, "My apolololojeez. Tollk must get back to other work."

The flesh golem Tollk says, "Now I must get back work. Much work to do. Many books write. No more make better tonight. Maybe morrow."

The flesh golem Tollk waves goodbye as he slumps to the back of the wagon. His many hands all wave together.
"I hope you have not been leading a double life, pretending to be wicked and being really good all the time. That would be hypocrisy." - The Importance of Being Earnest, Oscar Wilde

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